Those Four Little Words.....

You want to see me lose it quickly? You want to see me through a captain-sized tantrum? Just say those four little words to me:

"With All Due Respect"

And then follow it with something condescending, moronic, and disrespectful.

I just love that people think they can throw in a phrase like "with all due respect" at the beginning of a sentence and then say whatever they feel like saying afterwords, expecting no consequences.

"With all due respect, I think your idea is dumb and you have no idea what you're doing" Yeah, and if someone could point out where the respectful part was in that sentence, I'd appreciate it. It's also like putting "ma'am" in front of a sentence or at the end. "Ma'am, you're a bitch, but I said ma'am, so you can't get mad." Yeah, wanna bet?

I recently had a run-in with "with all due respect" when this idiot at my brigade headquarters started arguing with me. And the conversation went a-like so:

Idiot: Reminder, I need your leave allocations today! *note that "today" was the 13th*

Me: Reminder? When was the first notice?

Idiot: Ma'am, this is a report I require every day on the 9th.

Me: (checking calendar) You require it on the 9th? And today is the what?

Idiot: (obviously not getting my point that he's asking for a report 4 days after it's "required") With all do respect, thanks for getting the stuff in, but if your serious about the date, it's due on the 13th at this camp.

Me: Well, genius, I'm not on your camp. You ask for report on a different day every month. I was just pointing out that it is indeed NOT due on the 9th of each month. Also, you spell "due" D-U-E and you spell "you're" Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E. Don't ever start an email to me again with the words "With all due respect". However, please feel free to start your emails with the word Ma'am since I'm an officer and you aren't.

AUGH! I was so pissed off. But it's ok to be a MORON because he's doing it WITH ALL DUE RESPECT. How about instead of saying you owe me respect, you just show me some? Would that be so freakin' hard?!?!

And, before my blood vessels explode, I leave you to contemplate what your least favorite four little words are.