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Sunday, November 13, 2011

16 sad little diabetic cupcakes.

It all started last Thursday, picking Avery up from day care.  A three-day weekend awaited, and I had to grab him, get home, get him fed, get him to bed, and pack for our 5am wake up call to get to the Baltimore airport.  As I was collecting my child and his things, the lady who takes care of him in the afternoon said, "Avery sure had fun at the birthday party yesterday."  I knew that Tristan, another little boy had turned 1 the day before.  Avery was turning 1 in four days.  "Um...birthday party?"  Then, I did what I always do: talk to Avery in a sing-song voice while I was really trying to grill an adult.  "Wow, Avery, a party!  We'll have to bring in some treats for your birthday!"  In my head, I was saying "Dear God, let this lady say that they supply all treats and birthday party crap so I don't have to do anything."  Instead, she said "Yeah, that would be great, some homemade cupcakes or something."  I started to laugh...then realized I was the only one.  Every Avery was looking at me like I was a loon.

So, the plan was to go on our three day trip to Florida, come home, quickly grab my version of homemade cupcakes (a box of cupcake mix, a tub of icing, and sprinkles).  Florida happened, we hit the grocery store on the way home from the airport and I picked up a yellow cake mix, vanilla icing, and decided I'd run to the party store later to get something cute to put on them.  Maybe some "A"s or something.

You see, I really WANT to be one of those moms who puts her child's monogram or silhouette on a cupcake.  I really do.  I want to put Avery in an adorable "I'm One Today!" onesie and send him to school with gorgeous little treats.  I want to have a themed birthday party with favors, hats, matching outfits of sorts, you know, a Martha Stewart one-year-old party. 

Instead, the birthday party was a cake that Avery had to share with his cousin.  I think it was orange and red icing, blue letters that said AVERY, a haphazard plus sign I wrote in orange icing, pink letters that said MIA (cousin), along with a giant "1" candle, a giant "7" candle, and just to make it busier, 8 OTHER candles.  A hot mess of a cake.

The onesie?  A quick trip to Target, which I KNEW KNEW KNEW carried birthday hats and shirts for babies found that children aren't allowed to have birthdays during the holiday season, which starts before Halloween. All birthday shirts were replaced with Christmas outfits, and a query of a worker got me a grunt and a "Nooooo" as though I murdered the baby Jesus by suggesting my son might also have a birthday around the corner.   "No sweat," I thought as I dashed down to the party store where I was sure to pick up a cute birthday bib as well as what surely were dozens of cupcake toppers to choose from.  And I'm sure they are in there.  There are probably toppers that sing "Avery is one today!" but I wouldn't know because the fucking store is locked.  I know it FEELS like it's later because of daylight savings time, but it's really only 6pm on a Sunday.  WHY ARE YOU CLOSED?  YOU'RE A PARTY STORE!.  There's a reputation to keep up.

So, I slither home, defeated.  Avery has no birthday attire.  Just a birth certificate I could always pin to his shirt.  The only white kid will be bringing boring white cupcakes to school.  White cupcakes with no sprinkles. Bonus points to me when Jon points out "Hey, did you know you bought sugar free everything?"  Good lord, I bought the diabetic desserts.  So, 16 sad little cupcakes that never overflow the cupcake liners like they do in the magazines sit in a tupperware box with icing all over the top and the liners.  16 sad little diabetic cupcakes. 

So while his actual birthday won't be AMAZING, he did have a great time with family smashing a cake to smithereens.  I think I'll show him this video when he's older and tell him THAT was his birthday :-)

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