Ahhhhhh....

Have you ever been dreading something or felt like the weight of the world was on your shoulders? I hate that feeling, but when something gets resolved, it feels sooooo good.

I'm in the last year of law school, and I had a moderately challenging academic schedule ahead of me. The most daunting was a clinic, which is where I go out in the world and actually practice law. Cool? Very. Stressful? Very. I got assigned to the District Attorney's office in Dorchester, which is sure to have a lot of crimes coming through it in the next few months. So....why was I not happy?

The clinic would take the only two free days in my week (Wednesday and Friday) and fill them with work. All day at the courthouse. My train ride would be longer, since I'd be switching from the orange to the red to get to Dorchester. And, I was a little nervous, to tell the truth, it's a big responsibility to actually get out and practice law. Tie all of that in with additional work for the clinic (writing journal reflections and attending seminars) and I'm spending about 18 hours a week for 3 credits.

The alternative? Take a 3 hour course on mediation Thursday from 4-7. Learn how to mediate arguments (97% of cases doing even GO to trial), do some fun role-playing, have Wednesdays and Fridays completely off so I can do homework during the day and spend the evenings at theater rehearsals, with Jon, or just relaxing and watching television.

So, even though it's not really my nature to turn away for a challenge, sanity won out. I want to enjoy this last year of law school, and, as I get older, I appreciate how fast life is going for me, so I should make myself happy. And after a toss-and-turn night that followed long discussions with Jon about my options and what I was thinking, I dropped the clinic and picked up mediation. And then the feeling hit me. I can only imagine it was like endorphins that runners experience (I've never had that feeling) because I felt free and relaxed and like I could actually enjoy a semester of law school.

While I regret not being able to experience the chaos and fun of the DA's office, I've had enough chaos in my life already, with more likely to come down the road. No need to pile it on myself unnecessarily!!!